what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
