Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
