discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
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On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
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He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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