i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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