And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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