Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize