That's intense
I could make wine with my vomit
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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