I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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