Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
