hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
You left your phone here
Wait...
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