Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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