If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
