How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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