Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
