she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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