my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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