And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
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Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
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I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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