finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize