Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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