I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
