I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Randomize
