Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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