Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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