I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
