And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize