at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
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