My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
