my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
