im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
