If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
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