He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
