They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
