That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
