just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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