somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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