Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
