You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
