Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize