brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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