i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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