mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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