Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
