The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
