she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
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