i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
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And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
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ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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