What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize