Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
The beer is more important than you right now.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
