Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
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