Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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