so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
