Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
porn star boner night. come get it.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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