And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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